A few months back I wrote this seething essay on body hair and the difference, or lack thereof, between a man and wombyn’s armpits. It was inspired by an article I had seen circulating Facebook about the “new armpit hair trend” and the nasty response it garnered from men and wombyn alike. A previous employer of mine shared the article with the tagline “gross”, while members of both sexes chimed in the comments section with remarks echoing his own. One person even posted a meme of a drunk guy spewing what I can only assume to be 12 White Russians and his dinner into a barroom toilet. A bit dramatic really, but his point was made nonetheless.
Today I saw another piece geared toward greater awareness and empowerment of the underarm topic but still referred to the choice to let it grow as a “trend” and a bizarre one at that. It’s not bizarre, it’s not a trend, it’s hair and it’s natural. It grows on our heads, all over our bodies and it’s there for a reason. It’s also a choice, so before I go any further I want to clarify that I empower wombyn to shave or not shave, to let it grow like the Amazon or prune and trim it all away. It’s your choice, your own sacred contract that you get to make with yourself. Trust me, babes; I used to compulsively shave and trim and wax out of sheer embarrassment and disgust for the hair that grows on me. Nothing sent my stomach into my throat like having a boy see my un-groomed yoni or touching my legs if they hadn’t been shaved that morning. I used to wear long sleeve shirts solely for the purpose of covering my forearm hair, which I felt to be too long and much too abundant.
“Today I want to talk about WOMEN. Beautiful, real, flesh and bone women.
I haven’t shaved my legs or underarms since Siem Reap. HIPPIE!!! You cry out the label, satisfied to have categorized me into a safe and tiny box that you can understand. Suuuure, I’m a hippie- let’s call it that. Claiming power and my intrinsic right to use my body however I feel empowered to. I want to talk about why male nipples, armpit hair, leg hair, eyebrows, stomach fat is apparently different than a womans nipples, armpit hair, leg hair, eyebrows, stomach fat”
– excerpt from original essay, written 147 days ago
I opted not to post the piece as it came off like a rant and there’s enough anonymous ranting happening on these platforms, however the topic is still prevalent and close to my heart. I used to serve brunch at a popular restaurant and I had this regular who would always come in alone. He was quite the fashion forward dresser and really loved those XL tanks that have armholes down to the waist. He looked good and I liked the style he was working, but what struck me most was his armpits; fully visible and fully hairy. No big deal right? Right. So what if he was a she? Would we afford her the same indifference we do to men who eat their eggs Benedict with their pits blowing in the breeze? There isn’t a discrepancy here, we’ve been programmed to believe there is but it’s all lies, intended to fuel the patriarchy and keep the Divine Feminine under wraps. A dogged quest to keep wombyn subdued, ladylike and demure. Doing everything possible to stem the wild, the innate, the intuitive. This is not to say that all wombyn must stop shaving their armpits to become conscious and in touch with the Divine and their wild nature, but I will tell you that the deeper you enter into your own inner harmony, the less you will care about your outer appearance.
Having hair on your legs and under your arms does not make you less of a wombyn, less feminine or less beautiful. Your kindness is what matters, do you feel yourself? Do you love yourself? Are you doing all you can to shine your light on others and share the brilliance of your soul? That’s beauty, that’s femininity, that’s Divine. Your body is your own, you are sovereign in your earthly shell and you can do with it what you wish. Our hair grows upon us, IT GROWS! Like a tree from the earth. Wouldn’t it be strange for us to go into a forest or a grassy field and say “oh, I learned this isn’t very attractive; letting it grow all wild and natural like this, we should cut it down, make it prettier.” This is how I see the hair on my body now, I’ve made my choice. I no longer have the tolerance for time spent “beautifying” to make my body more acceptable to the social standard. Does this mean I’ll never shave my legs again? I don’t know, maybe or maybe not, but I know that things are changing. We must do all we can to be truly comfortable in the skin where we live, self-love is the way in. Let us consider shaving (or not shaving) entirely for our own prerogative and preferences- asking ourselves if we’re doing it because we think it’s expected of us, asking ourselves if we are acting out of programming or a genuine desire to be smooth all over. Know this; every inch of you is beautiful and worthy of love, every hair from your head to your toes has been kissed by the light of our Creator. Know that you are perfect and whole unconditional love, NOW. Exactly as you are.
Hide not, wild wombyn and be proud. How many battle scars do you wear upon your flesh? How ancient is your soul? Share with us the rich tapestry of your inner world for the earth needs your medicine. In any way you can, administer the magic from within you and heal yourself as you heal us all.